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“Nurses eat their young” is a common phrase that is engrained into the minds of nurses everywhere. What I learned the hard way – it can start as early as nursing school.

It is so, so real.

This summer I started a job at a new long-term care facility and had my first shift on my own. However, I had done CNA work for 5 years, I know how to do cares like the back of my hand.

I was originally supposed to have an internship in the ED-Trauma department at a major hospital that I was extremely excited for. Due to COVID-19, it was unfortunately cancelled. I decided to take a position as a summer CNA at a facility that was desperate for CNA help due to the rising COVID-19 cases.

I was pulled to a floor I had never been on before, and of course I was slow as I have never been one to half-do my cares in order to get all the residents done faster.

I was told to take my lunch break, which I did, and had no clue what I was coming back to.

Long story short, I was completely belittled by a nurse manager on my floor in front of all of the other nurses and CNAs. I was accused of taking my break when I was not supposed to, not following the daily schedule correctly, and yelled at over our walkie talkie system which everyone, including the residents, can hear. Take into consideration this was my first day on my own in a separate facility and new floor I had never stepped foot on. I stood there, in tears, innocently and hopeless explaining I was brand new and had never been trained on this floor, but the nurse wasn’t taking it. I had never met this woman before.

I’d like to thank the angel of a LPN who noticed I was struggling and pulled me into a closet and let me break down into tears, personally went with me to the floor to help with cares, and gave me time to collect myself before I went back out on to the floor with tears still running down my face shield for the remainder of my shift.

All I could think of was, “I should be at my internship in the ED-Trauma department right now. I chose to move here. I chose to come help this facility because I knew they desperately needed the help due to COVID-19. I’m even running on five hours of sleep because I stayed late the previous night to finish all the cares and to help out on the other campus.” I wanted to defend myself, but I stood there paralyzed and struggled to return to work the rest of the summer.

According to the Joint Commission, 44% of nursing staff members have been bullied.

Never, will I ever belittle my CNAs, patient care techs, or anyone considered “lower” than me. I know how it feels to be a newbie, overworked, and underappreciated.

I highly encourage anyone who experiences workplace bullying to report it immediately. You aren’t “tattling,” you are saving yourself, and probably many others, from mental distress and abuse. No one deserves to go to work scared or dreading it.

Nursing doesn’t have room for bullying. Stop eating your young.